Is it Friday yet?

Hey Y’all! (Remember that’s North Carolinian for you all) I Bought new tires. Nothing quickens the heart of a girl like a new set of tires. Can’t wait to show all my friends.

Noticed an emerging zit on my chin. Carefully applied my super-de-doopery zit medicine. Prided myself for not messing with the zit. Discovered later on day it wasn’t a zit. It was jelly.

Stopped by the dry cleaners to pick up a shirt I had dropped off. The clerk disappeared into the back where the mystery of dry cleaning occurs. I heard a lot of rustling of plastic and Korean chatter before the clerk appeared and said, “No shirt give me phone number” I gave her my phone number and she punched in some buttons and said “No shirt” and shrugged her shoulders. And then she said something in Korean to the other workers and everyone started laughing. Went home and found the shirt hanging neatly in the dry cleaning plastic in the closet. I had already picked it up.

Spent my summer vacation fund, summer shoes fund and general entertainment fund on back to school stuff, fees and textbooks. Why is that your children’s educational needs always trump your sanity needs? Even though it’s my money and I’m the one who’s going insane. But no, I’m not bitter.

Coasted into the gas station on fumes. Removed gas cap and began pumping gas. Knocked gas cap off its holder. Falls to the ground. Rolls under the car. Beyond my reach. Searched car for gas cap retrieving device. Cursed myself for cleaning car. Crawled under the car and retrieved gas cap. Tried to pretend that I didn’t have my nose centimeters from someone’s gum. Thought to myself AFTER I retrieved gas cap “You could have just pulled the car forward a little to get the cap…you idiot!”

Reached up to scratch my ear at Wal-Mart. Caught my watch on my sweater. Sweater and watch lock in bizarre interspecies mating ritual. Left Wal-Mart with a watch hanging from the front of my sweater and probably axle grease in my hair. Tried to look normal.

And it’s only Tuesday…