How I cleaned my master bedroom

1. Walked in to master bedroom. Decided the nightstands and bookshelves needed dusting.

2. On the way out of my bedroom, I turned and looked over my shoulder and determined that the pictures on the wall needed to be rearranged.

3. Took the pictures off the wall so that I could play with the arrangement, stacked the pictures against the wall then cleared off one nightstand to dust.

4. Vowed to re-hang the pictures once the dusting was finished and start a new pile of stuff for taking to Good Will.

5. Walked to the laundry room. Secured dust rag and Pledge.

6. Headed back toward the bedroom. As I passed through the living room I contemplated rearranging the living room furniture.

7. Moved the rocker and couches, decided that it looked weird and moved everything back to its original formation.

8. Strained - and this is just an estimation - seventy two different muscles in my lower back.

9. Dusted the living room end tables and saw some dust bunnies so I went and got the vacuum cleaner.

10. Vacuumed the living room and vowed that I was going to make new living room curtains because I hate what is in there now.

11. Went back to my room and started looking through my fabric to decide if I had anything that I could whip up into new curtains.


12. Didn’t find anything I liked in my stash and decided to go to the fabric store and The Walmart for Ibuprofen to help my back.

13. Stood in living room waiting for Teen to get ready to go run errands. They have to primp and change clothes to run errands...and these are boys.

14. Went to Walmart and bought a few groceries and the Ibuprofen and completely forgot about going to the fabric store.

15. Went back into my bedroom after the groceries were put away and Couldn’t remember what led me to that room in the first place.

16. Oh, yes. THE DUSTING.

17. Decided that I would dust just as soon as I vacuumed the rug because we all know the vacuum kicks up more dust and then you have to dust twice and I’m not about doing any EXTRA work.

18. But I couldn’t vacuum until I made a poster for Relief Society with the enrichment announcements, planning to use glitter and would vacuum afterward.

19. Got out the craft supplies and then Teen #2 wanted to practice his poker playing. So we sat down and played a few hands. Won four out of the five Texas Hold-Em games. NOT THAT I WAS KEEPING SCORE.

20. Finished a really cute poster for Relief Society and then vacuumed the rug.

21. Remembered that I was supposed to be dusting.

22. Heard cell phone beep.

23. Found phone and answered text which I’m not very good at.

24. Checked email since I was standing next to the computer.

25. Saw an email with some pictures I’d been waiting for.

26. Wrote several reply emails to my Relay for Life Team (I’m the captain).

27. Fixed a snack for Teen 2. And one for me, too.

28. Folded a load of clothes.

29. Put away clothes and while I was putting my towels away decided that my shower had to be cleaned immediately.

30. Scoured the shower with Mr. Clean.

31. Decompressed from bathroom cleaning unpleasantness by playing a round of Free Cell on the computer.

32. Felt renewed sense of motivation and purpose after decisive Free Cell win.

33. Walked back in the bedroom.

34. Cleared old magazines and books off the nightstand.

35. Dusted the dadgum nightstands and bookcases and rehung the pictures in their exact same order approximately four and a half hours after the whole process began.

But I have to say that now? That my bedroom? Is SPOTLESS.

And that is understandable, especially given my efficiency.