Ambitiousy Ambitiousness

I’m not much of a resolution fan, mainly because resolutions just remind me how bad I am at finishing the stuff that I start. I mean, I can sit around and dream big dreams and share big ideas all the livelong day, but when it comes to, you know, actually doing those things consistently, it’s a crapshoot. I might or I might not. Depends on my mood. And how many books I have in my reading pile and movies in my Netflix queue.

The bottom line is that I’m just not very good at setting what I like to call FAYNCEE GOALS because FAYNCEE GOALS overwhelm me. FAYNCEE GOALS pretty much ensure that I’m going to give up within a short amount of time. FAYNCEE GOALS make me want to run in my house and lock the door and eat potato chips and onion dip and watch DVDs of “The Office” until ALL THE GOALS GO AWAY.

I know. It’s an inspiring approach to life, isn’t it?

So when 2010 (never thought I would be typing such a futuristic date) rolled around, I didn’t make resolutions for the reasons I just mentioned. I love fresh beginnings, but I hate – HATE – feeling overwhelmed. I thought about a couple of things I’d like to try to do differently, but there were no 180s, no radical changes. Just some general thoughts about possibilities that might be worth considering.

Because I’m very structured.

Over the last week, though, I’ve been pretty convicted in two particular areas: 1) breakfast and 2) faithfulness in the small things. I’m not saying by ANY stretch of the imagination that these are the only two things in my life that I need to work on, OH MY WORD NO, because truth be told if I made a list of every single area of my life that needs improvement I WOULD NEVER GET OUT OF THE BED AGAIN, but these two areas keep coming to mind as places where I can make some good changes without sliding into the dreaded state of being overwhelmed.

Which brings us to breakfast.

For the last couple of years I have been Queen of the PopTarts and Granola bars. At times I’ve felt like that grandmother in “Sixteen Candles” who opens up a box of Hostess donuts with a spatula and then says, “VOILA. BREAKFAST IS SERVED.” Because that’s about how much effort I’ve put into what my hulking gorillas eats in the mornings (me? I eat a scoop of peanut butter, so obviously there is room for improvement in this area). I know that they like grits and bananas and bacon and biscuits and pancakes and lots of other breakfast options, but between getting all of us up and out the door, I’ve slacked on the cooking. So I’m going to try and do better about that. If you have any suggestions for easy and healthy breakfasts I would appreciate a note in the comments section. I did start of today with a hot breakfast for me and Wes before we had to leave. Wes was so shocked and that added to my delight immeasurably.

Neveryoumind that my hair now smells like bacon and that people keep coming by my office and sniffing the air and giving me that “I hate you for having time to eat breakfast this morning” stare. THAT IS A SMALL PRICE TO PAY FOR HOT BACON.

As for being faithful in the small things, that mainly means that I want to try to help my husband by doing the little things that speak volumes to him: sticking to the grocery budget, getting my oil changed when he asks, throwing out stuff in the refrigerator before it grows legs and tries to make a break for it, taking time to think about wants vs. needs when I’m in a store, etc. I’m not an extravagant person by any stretch of the imagination, but I have a bad habit of justifying minor purchases because they’re minor purchases. $10 here. $15 there. $25 at the other place. And before I know it, I’ve spent $100 on, I don’t know, pens and shampoo and chicken breasts and a couple of shirts from Target. I also want to show him that spiritual study and edification are as important and meaningful to me as they are to him and to support him in his desire to find a time when our family can have regular family home evenings. We used to be so good at it, but now that they boys have jobs as well as school our schedules rarely match up and that has been weighing very heavily on my husband’s mind.

So I’m hoping that developing better habits with the little stuff will communicate to my husband that what matters to him matters to me, too. I know in my head that the little stuff adds up and makes a big difference, but the problem is that sometimes the selfish part of my heart cries out for a cute pair of sandals. Or a funky pair of pants for the low low price of $19.99. Or countertop spray that makes my kitchen smell like a forest of evergreens.

But Fantastik will be fantastic (see my play on words there…I know, I have a talent) in 2010, oh yes ma’am it will.

So what about y’all? What are you working on in 2010?

Holla back in the comments. I’ll just be sitting here eating leftover bacon.

See? Breakfast is a MIGHTY GOOD THING indeed. Oh and I may or may not be embarking on a new workout challenge and doing the Jillian Michael’s “Shred It” workout.