1. I was driving home the other day and I started to hear a strange rattling noise in my car. I got very freaked out, turned down the radio, and listened to the deep buzzing sound coming from my dash. Do I have a flat tire? Is there an animal trapped under my hood? Is my engine about to blow up? I suddenly realized it stopped. And then started again. And then stopped. Very rhythmic. WHAT IS GOING ON!? And then I saw: My phone, on vibrate, sitting on the console.
2. I preheated the oven to bake some chicken the other night. I walked away and came back several minutes later and the light was still on. I walked away and came back and the light was STILL on. I was all, “What’s the DEAL” until I realized I had accidentally turned on the stove, not the oven. Duh. So I turned off the stove and walked away. I came back and saw the light off. I put the chicken in the oven, and set the timer. The timer went off so I got the chicken out of the oven. The chicken was still cold. I had never even turned the oven on. Not only that - but I never even noticed it wasn’t hot when I put the chicken in the oven.
3. I freaked out because I thought my digital camera for work had been stolen. (Although I admit - there was a small part of me that knew I’d done something stupid with it.) I went through every drawer, filing cabinet, cupboard and cranny in the Office. I even looked in cupboard in the ladies bathroom where we keep the unmentionable supplies. It was later found. In my tote bag. Directly next to my desk, Where I then remembered putting it so that I wouldn’t forget to take it to my next interview.
4. I tried to pay for my breakfast the other day with a gift card from the photo lab at Target. I was obviously not eating at the photo lab at Target. I was eating at Panera Bread. It doesn’t look anything like a Panera gift card. Not even close. I swiped it twice before I realized it, but not before I said, “I think your machine is broken. Can you swipe it on the register?”
5. I tried to clean my bathroom mirror with my scenting spritzer from Bath and Body Works the warm vanilla sugar stuff. This tells you two things: 1) I don’t spritz often and 2) I don’t clean my mirror often.
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3 comments:
I'm glad that I'm not the only one who does stuff like that...i think the phone vibrating story is CLASSIC and could win some award in mother/housekeeping magazine contest.
My excuse is being a working mom (OK so major part-time) and having not only myself and my schedule to worry about but 3 others.
Thanks for sharing your stories...good laughs!
Oh yeah...one more thing. My mom has a T shirt that says "Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult." She had it on the day she locked herself out of her car and had to call a locksmith.
I actually think those things should get you into the hood. We all do those things, and at the same time we wonder why our kids have no common sense. It keeps us humble I guess.
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