Wesley is taking an AP Environmental Science class at school this year. He has ton of stupid assignments that he has to have done before the first day of school which is in 1 week. So being the good mother that I am, I have been looking for some articles on the environment that he can use for his summer homework and I came across this rug… kinda cute I think.
I don’t really get it but the little 3-D polar bear is supposed to make you realize why global warming is horrible and then when people come to your house they see it and they feel bad and then that somehow helps the bears. It’s some metaphoric art thing that is deeply meaningful and probably hard to vacuum.
Also, in my house the cats would eat the crap out of that bear in like 5 seconds. So metaphorically speaking, the real danger here is cats. Or maybe the message here is that cats are more dangerous than global warming or polar bears. Which, is a pretty poor analogy because cats aren’t dangerous at all unless you trip on them and fall without using your hands to catch you and you left a wooden dowel on the floor and it goes straight through your eyeball and into your brain and kills you. Which would be a really horrible and messy way to die and actually now that I think about it, is probably more of an concern than global warming because I have two cats that like to flop down right in front of you while you’re walking around the house and I am always tripping on them. I also have lots of dowels because I like to craft and I’ve never even seen a polar bear except at the zoo. In fact, I’m not even sure they really exist, except at the zoo and on the Discovery Channel.
So I guess the real message here is “Your cat is trying to murder you so make sure you catch yourself with your hands if it trips you because if you left wooden dowels sticking straight up around your house you’re probably gonna get impaled, you idiot.” And also that polar bears are probably made up and don’t really exist, except at the zoo, so who needs to save them anyway. I would love it if I had a nice cold cave with a big ball to play with and lots and lots of steak for dinner. How hard can their life really be at the zoo.
4 comments:
Before I read your post and was just looking at the picture, I was confused and disoriented. It looked kind of odd, it couldn't be a picture...
Then I read your post and HOWLED (cat speak), it was so funny. I imagine having that stupid bear on my carpet and trying to vacumm it and having it get sucked up, not because my vacuum is all that good, but because that would be my luck, to have my happy polar bear snapped up by my lame vacuum.
My cat doesn't usually get in my way when I am walking, and when he sees me coming in general he gets out of the way. But there have been occasions when I am sure both he and I are goners. Him from his crush injuries and me from my fall and subsequent impaling by the broomstick I am carrying.
Wesley and I had some interesting discussions about the environment on our car ride. There is plenty of time for talking when you drive 15 hours each way. I love his passion for saving the environment and fortunately he isn't some left wing loon about it.
As far as the cat thing, I'm smart enough not to have more creatures to trip on, my children are enough right now. I hope those cats bring you joy in other areas of your life, otherwise I would say bye bye to the murderous creatures.
Pretty funny, thanks for the comic relief. Life around here has been a little too serious lately.
p.s. We were driving in the car last night and Sydney out of nowhere said "Where's Wesley". That incited an entire conversation all about how much we miss Wes, all spoken by the children. He made an impact and now the countdown is on for when he comes again.
I hate cats... They can kill me without even trying.
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