Guest Post by my long-time friend, Mr. Alan Rickman

Friends and Family, I find that I am really rather busy these last few days what with trying to find a car that is both suitable for the family and affordable (AKA Free) coupled with the fact that I am still in mourning due to the departure of my family and the constant stupidity of my almost 18 year old son. In light of all that I find that I don't have anything worth blogging about. So I called on my good friend one of the most respected actors of our time, Mr. Alan Rickman, who has gotten me through many a bout with the blues.

My name is Alan Rickman.

I. Am. A. Thespian.

Not an actor. A thespian.

Ah thes-pee-ahn.

A serious thespian.

You can tell that I am a serious thespian, in two keys way.

Firstly, I have appeared in many serious movies. Yes, I have been in those wretched Harry Potter films, but I wish to be remembered for my appearances in serious films. Like The Winter Guest with Emma Thompson, and Galaxy Quest Snow Cake with Sigourney Weaver. I and my ample gravitas were most recently in Sweeney Todd. You might not have noticed since Johnny Depp is a bit of an attention whore.

Another sign that I am a serious actor: I am parsimonious with my smiles. It is not that I am dour or humourless, but rather because serious thespians can't be seen as daft berks.

If you have seen me smiling there are several simple explanations, which can best be reconciled with the help of visual aides:

Picture 1

In this picture you see a smile because I am pondering something really profound that Holley had just said to me. All of you who know her, know that she is completely disarming and the most entertaining conversationalist I have ever come across.

Picture 2


Here I am laughing at something completely outrageous and witty that Holley said. That woman just slays me with her wry humor, if I didn't know any better, I would think she was British.

Picture 3



This picture was done in photoshop. You see my friend Holley has such an amusing sense of humor. She thought this would make an excellent Holiday card with me "making merry." That woman is so daft, but she does make me laugh.

However, you may have run into one or two photos out in the realm of the World Wide Web in which they show me in the most unflattering light. I can assure you they are altered pictures. Photoshop is truly the bane of the serious actor. I was just chuntering about this yesterday while sharing a round of Applejacks with Edward Norton.

Well my agent is on the line so I must away. Best wishes to the friends and family of my dearest friend, Holley, who is perhaps the most beautiful and charming person I know, and she assures me that you are all just like her. I hope to one day meet you all in person in that charming little Hamlet called Springville. Tell me, isn't that where Homer Simpson lives? Hmmmm, fascinating!