If I were graded daily on motherhood, this weekend I would have gotten a D-. The only thing that would have prevented me from getting an F outright would be the fact that I did feed my children this weekend. That has to get me some points, right? But dinner was macaroni and cheese… from a box… and not the Organic kind either. Nope I served my children the day glow orange mac and cheese. And I called it dinner. Let’s not forget the pizza and hamburgers. My kids have not had a decent home cooked meal in about 8 days. In my defense, we are in the process of moving.
All weekend long I yelled at my children. They were fighting and yelling at each other, so it seemed the only sensible thing to do would be to yell right back. I mean I know I listen to someone screaming in the background like a shrew.
Yesterday I told my son that I did not want to hear another Calvin and Hobbes comic recited verbatim when he refuses to even memorize all his multiplication tables and other important academic material, because it makes me crazy that he is wasting his obviously limited precious brain cells on that useless crap. Yes, I said that. Nice, huh? He had a comeback that would have made his Grandpa McGiven proud about calculators and being an underappreciated genius.
Said by me during a particularly loud and rowdy dinner last night.
“Will you shut your mouths and eat your dinner already.”
Hearing muffled laughter I turned around to see two hulking gorilla teenagers, with closed mouths, banging their hamburgers against their lips.
And I laughed, while silently cursing them, like mothers have been doing since time began, I hope you have children just like you.
Interesting questions asked this weekend.....
Me: “Why did you think it was okay to poke your brother in the back with your fork because he was breathing near you?”
Teen: “Because.”
Me: “You are breathing near me and I’m not stabbing you with my fork.”
Teen: “You want to thought, right?”
Me: “But the point is that I’m not”
Me: “Why did you just trip him?”
Teen: “I didn’t think that would happen!”
Me: “Well, how about you clear this up for me. Just what did you think would happen when you stuck your foot out as you brother ran by?”
Needless to say, Santa will not be visiting our house this year and Brien is grounded from driving for two weeks and Wesley is grounded from his MP3 player (that one was kind of hard as I had to surgically remove the ear buds from his ears).
On a brighter note, we are almost all moved in to our new house (pictures coming as soon as I find my digital camera.) We actually have electricity and hot water two accommodations I seriously thought we were going to have to forgo, making my house the world’s most expensive tent! This fact made me very nervous as Dane’s brother, Marc and his family came to visit the day after we got moved in.
My mom is coming to visit me and after the week that I’ve had I can think of no better reward for all my hard work. There were many times this past weekend that I said to myself “I want my mommy!” Oh and my Dad is coming too :-)
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2 comments:
Holley, You deserve mother of the year for dealing with two teenagers. Don't underestimate yourself, I figure if they are alive and healthy and well adjusted, you get an A. No questions asked on how you got them to that state, just that they are there.
Have fun with your mom, oh and your dad too. :)
Wow, so it does get better, ha ha. I was hoping sometime the fighting would end but apparently not. I guess I'll just keep inventing more lessons on being a Peacemaker for FHE. Oh and atleast I'm lucky enough that the Santa threat still works.
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