I hope you've been doing well this week. I miss you! I had to tell you about this crazy argument that Dane and I had the other day. I think this just proves that I've fully entered the 5th Dimension AKA Menopause. You know the state women enter when they reach a certain age and their husband is driving them crazy!
Our conversation went like this :
Dane: Look at this video its really cool. It’s about a company that invented a tool that lets you drive using only your mind.
me: Awesome. I’m so glad we’re making such huge advances in the field of driving-a-car-without-hands. It’s good that the scientists have a new priority now that they’ve found a cure for cancer.
Dane: The concept is pretty cool. You can drive all the way to work just sitting there.
me: They already invented a tool for that. It’s called a bus.
Dane: I think I want one. You could drive yourself to the grocery store and learn to play the flute at the same time.
me: I would kill myself in about 8 seconds in that car. What about all the times you think about driving off the edge of a cliff? Does it compensate for that?
Dane Who in the world thinks about driving off a cliff?
me: Um…me. And everyone.
Dane: ?&#$$*
me: You don’t imagine -for just a second- about driving off a bridge every time you drive over one?
Dane: Why would I do that?
me: Because it’s human nature. Everyone does that. You never actually do it but everyone thinks about it.
Dane: Well I don’t think about it.
me: Well then, maybe there’s something wrong with you.
Dane: Maybe there’s something wrong with me because I don’t think about driving off cliffs on a regular basis?
me: Or because you want a car so you can play the flute. Neither of those are particularly normal.
Dane: Okay, first of all, the flute was for you. Secondly, I think there’s something really wrong with you.
me: Probably. I like how in the video they’re all “Don’t try this at home” because that disclaimer is totally the only thing keeping me from driving my car with my mind right now. I mean, that and the fact that we’re out of brain sensors.
Dane Just stop talking.
me: If I was driving a brain-car I’d make it go to Taco Bell all the time and you’d be all “Where are we going? We don’t have time for this” and I’d be like “I’m not doing it! It’s the car. It must want encharitos” and then I could get encharitos all the time and you couldn’t yell at me about it because you couldn’t prove I was doing it on purpose.
Dane When have I ever yelled at you about encharitos? WHY IS THIS EVEN AN ISSUE?
me: You’d totally yell at me if I suddenly veered off to get unexpected encharitos. That’s why I’ve never even tried it. Because I know you. But just wait until we get our mind-control car. There are going to be unexpected encharitos everywhere.
PS. Then Dane said that I just proved that I can’t be trusted with a mind controlled car, which was kind of my point to begin with. I win. Except now I totally want encharitos and I have no brain-controlled car to get them for me. Touché, scientists. Way to create a demand.
No comments:
Post a Comment